Pastor Stu Weber asks? "What is the most powerful word in the English language? Have you ever thought about it? List some possibilities. Love? Hope? Vision? Sacrifice? There are many candidates.

How about Dad?

Ever thought of it that way before? It's worth considering. Just walk through what you know about life. When it comes to power in a youngster's world, I'll put my money on 'Dad.' As words go, hope, vision, and sacrifice don't mean a whole lot to little tykes. But the power of 'Dad' reaches far beyond a youngster's childhood. In fact it spans generations.

There are two ways: One is to see it at work. The other is to measure what happens when it is gone. Either way, 'Dad' is pretty potent. Present or absent. Positive or negative. The power of a father is incredible."

I. Negative - Absent

In verse eight of our scripture lesson this morning the Psalm writer spoke of the negative power of fathers. He referred to a stubborn and rebellious generation of fathers that did not prepare its heart, whose spirit was not faithful to God. Repeated again and again in the history of God's dealings with His people we find sad examples of the negative power of fathers. Such warnings from the scriptures should be heeded as we look at our culture in our generation, too.

Dr. James Dobson says, "Our very survival as a people will depend on the presence or absence of masculine leadership in millions of homes." While we might expect such an observation by a noted Christian leader, some secular teachers and writers make similar insights.

Professor Max Lerner wrote, "The 'vanishing father' is perhaps the central fact of the changing American family structure today."

From the New York Times Magazine an article said, "The Youth Board realized that it had penetrated into a world where there is no father. The welfare world of New York is a fatherless world."

A warning was printed in London's Daily Telegraph: "Entire neighborhoods will probably become dominated by an underclass of young delinquents within the next decade. The scale of crime...violence, and drug taking could easily surpass that of American cities. The fewer fathers in a community, the more the children would run wild."

Gordon Dalbey, a Christian author wrote:
"The biblical faith understands that healing between fathers and children is not simply a psychological exercise to bring greater peace of mind; instead, it is the essential prerequisite to fulfilling God's purposes on earth. When fathers are reconciled with sons and daughters, God's saving power is released among us; conversely, when fathers and children remain at odds with one another, powers of destruction are beckoned."

A pastor received a heart-wrenching letter from a woman in his congregation:

"My dad was what I thought was a real man.... He was the provider and worked hard for our physical needs. He had to go 150 miles away from home to find work, coming home often only on weekends.... As could be expected, I didn't know my dad very well.

When I reached adolescence, I began to desire more than anything to win his approval...it became an all consuming need. I went back and forth from being a tomboy to being feminine to try to get him to like me. I took up fishing and made myself pull worms apart and get slime underneath my fingernail so that I could bait my own hooks and we could go fishing. But he didn't have time to go fishing anymore.

I started playing softball and became the best pitcher in our school. But he never saw me play a game. I worked hard to get straight A's and was always on the honor roll. Never once did he say that he was proud of me... One year I was a cheer leader. He never came to a game. One year I was captain of the drill team. He never saw a performance.

One weekend I tried to help him work on the car. But he was cross with me and I was in the way. I went into the house and made some cookies. He said I baked them too long.

More and more I found myself retreating to my room on the weekends, sobbing violently, desperately wanting him to care. Not once did he comfort me. He never read to me. He never tucked me into bed. He never hugged me. He never kissed me. He never said, 'I love you.'

I got married and had four kids. The last one was a boy, the only male descendant. We gave him his name. He wasn't impressed. Restless and dissatisfied with mothering, I went back to school.

Somehow, without meaning to, I found myself studying civil engineering, the field of study closest to his profession. I worked as a surveyor last year laying out lines just like the line he had put in for years. I found myself thinking, 'If he could see me now, he would be proud of me.'

What a power a father has over the direction of a daughter's life. Good or bad, present or absent, he is going to have an influence that lasts a lifetime. I think a lot of fathers leave their daughters to the mothers to raise, thinking a man's influence isn't necessary for girls.

I'm thirty-seven years old now and beginning to see how much I am compelled by a deep craving within to gain the approval of this most significant man. You see, if my own father doesn't think I'm worthwhile, I must be worthless. If my own father can't accept me, then I am unacceptable. If my own father cannot love me, then I must be totally unlovable. If I'm truly worthless and unacceptable and unlovable, then God couldn't really love me. And certainly my dear husband, who is only human, couldn't really love me.

I thank God that He's opening my eyes to these lies and showing me his truth. He has begun the process of healing, but the wounds are really deep. I fear the affect of scarring will be with me while I remain on this earth."

What a letter! I hope no father here ever has such a letter written concerning their power used in a negative - absent manner. How devastating it can be. I found other negative illustrations, but want to move to the positive power of fathering as I close this message today

II. Positive - Present

The positive - present power of fathering is God's preference. God wants His people to listen to His instruction. Fathers are to tell the generations to come the praises of the Lord, His strength and the wondrous things He has done. God intends for fathers to pass on God's teachings to their children. The Psalmist then goes on to explain why. That the generation to come might know, even the children yet to be born, That they may arise and tell them to their children. That they should put their confidence in God, And not forget the works of God, but keep His commandments.

While I am delighted to see wonderful mothers teach their children about God and His word, what about the responsibility God has given to those of us who happen to be men and fathers and grandfathers?

Keith Meyering, administrator for Men's Life made this statement about the incredible spiritual power of a father in a child's life. "When the father is an active believer there is about a seventy- five percent likelihood that the children will also become active believers. But if only the mother is a believer this likelihood is dramatically reduced to fifteen percent."

Men, do we realize what this means in the lives of our children? Notice that Meyering did not merely say believer, but active believer, one who clearly loves Jesus Christ and practices his personal faith in his home, in his work, and in his church and community.

In practical ways that fit our circumstances, each of us should attempt to utilize the positive power of fathering to the fullest. We may need the creativity of wives and mothers to help us understand and plug into our children's lives in meaningful ways. Most fathers need to work to provide for the needs of their families, and sometimes that may prevent us from being as involved as we might like. Sometimes the situation may be somewhat temporary.

Stu Weber tells of the action his wife took when Uncle Sam sent him orders to Vietnam. "Determined to minimize my absence for Kent, our infant son, she went to the local bookstore and bought two copies of each childhood storybook we thought Kent would enjoy. I took one to Vietnam and she kept one here. I read the stories to him from across the Pacific via small tapes I sent home. She sat Kent on her lap, played tapes of my voice reading the stories, and turned the pages of the books for Kent, keeping pace with my voice. No child of hers was going to lose touch with his father if she had anything to do with it. Even Uncle Sam couldn't interrupt story time."

This is an example of how we might turn a potentially negative situation into a positive one. We need to be intentional about being involved in the lives of precious children. Often we are busy with good things, like making a living and serving God in our church and community. What about at home? I do NOT want to fail my children as I seek to faithfully serve God. Kids need to be affirmed and encouraged. Regardless of our circumstances we must genuinely communicate our love, our care, our acceptance of our children. They need dad's hugs literally and figuratively.

Conclusion:

A closing challenge for us fathers may be well expressed in these words of an anonymous poet:
I saw tomorrow.
I saw tomorrow marching.
I saw tomorrow marching on little children's feet.
Within their forms and faces her prophecy now complete.
I saw tomorrow look at me from little children's eyes
And thought, how carefully we would teach if we were really wise.

Men, and women, too. Remember the positive power of fathering! It's incredible. Put their hand in the hand of our Heavenly Father.

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